Intent

Welcome to February’s Insecure Writer’s Support Group, created by Alex Cavenaugh.

Intent. The online dictionary says the following on the subject.

Purpose; design; the state of a person's mind that directs his or her actions toward a specific object; meaning or significance. 

I started writing later in life…mid-fifties. My intent at that time was to hold a book in my hand…my words, my name on the cover. That intent became a reality when Saving Gracie was published in 2012, the year I turned 60.

After my third book, Time Trials, was released the end of November 2015, I realized my intent had changed. From just having a published book, I now wanted to be recognized for my writing. Three quick signing parties at the worst time of the year, the sales died off a bit, and the calm of the New Year rolled in. Two years had passed since the release of Partly Sunny, my second novel, so I had to rethink my strategy as to how to promote Time Trials.

Some head-scratching took place before the ding-ding-ding sounded in my head. Oh yeah, I needed to submit for editorial reviews, enter contests...that sort of thing. After submitting Time Trials to Readers’ Favorite, I became ecstatic at the five (1-2-3-4-5…I counted) stars I received plus the glowing review. What a high…

Then I started googling items like “how to get a review from the New York Times” (answer: forget it) and then Publisher’s Weekly, a significantly high-profile reviewer. They’d even established a special section for self-published authors. That seemed doable. Still on the magic carpet ride high from my 5-star Readers’ Favorite review, I sent off Time Trials.

Before going to sleep Monday night I checked my emails. Big mistake. Huge. This is what I found in the subject line from Publishers’ Weekly/Booklife…

Your project has been declined for review…

Then some nonsense about hoping I wouldn’t be discouraged and please consider submitting any future projects. Really? Declined to even read the book? Not a way to drift off into la-la-land (which in my case is an oxymoron…my sleeping habits have never been la-la-land).

Tuesday morning. New day. Thank goodness. I started to think and remembered my intent of wanting to be recognized for my writing. But I took it a step further. What does that look like? Does it mean I want to see my books showcased in the window of Barnes & Noble? Do I need to reach the best-sellers NYT list? No, but let’s face it…it would be nice. Do I want to make a million dollars? Okay, stop laughing, JK Rowling did...

I’ll be 64 years old this month (seriously, is that right?). I realized my life is full, and I write because I enjoy the process. Developing characters, personality traits, and their own voice is one of my greatest pleasures of writing. I treasure people telling me how much they enjoy my characters. Just this past Monday I received this message: “Wanted you to know I’m having trouble wanting to finish Time Trials because I am not ready to let go of those people’s lives yet.” Another note: “I just love your books!”

 

Now, that makes me smile. That is what my intent looks like. That makes me happy.

I’m sure I’ll re-evaluate my intent in a couple of years.

So….intent. Yours?

   

 

Push Notifications

Hello people and welcome to 2016. The year where change and all things are possible. It’s also time for the Insecure Writer’s Support Group post, hosted by Alex Cavenaugh. Hello Alex!

This month’s post: ENCOURAGEMENT (not just for writers)

The words “push notifications” have been on my mind for a while. After publishing my third book, Time Trials, a little over a month ago, someone recently asked “when is the fourth coming out?” Legitimate question, of course. But at the time, I felt like an inflatable yard art snowman and someone had just pulled the plug on the blower.

My last post was “The Birth of a Book” which for me took 2 years (long story). So, I guess when I heard “when is the fourth coming out” it was like someone asking when was I going to give birth again as I was wheeled out of the delivery room.

I envy writers who sit down and punch out book after book. A recent Facebook post by a fellow author said his New Year’s resolution was to publish 3 books (and was already 20,000 words into one). Are you kidding me?

GOSHDARNITALLTOHECK…

I have my little “to do” list all made out…let me see, I have it here somewhere. Oh well, I’ll find it eventually. I felt pretty good yesterday just getting my 2016 calendar up on my bulletin board and oh yeah, paying bills that were due on the 1st.

Push. Push. Push. My thesaurus refers to words like assault, attack, thrust, charge, forcing, nudge, prod, shove.

Notification. Notification. Notification: bulletin, warning, advertisement, advisory, notice...

By now, we’re all familiar with push notifications on our phones: AMBER Alerts, Weather Alerts, flight information, ESPN updates, breaking news, etc.

Then I realized my push notifications were internal...self-imposed.

What am I going to do next? Write another novel? Bring out the children’s book I wrote 7 yrs. ago? Try a $.99 book? Try, try, try to get BookBub to accept Partly Sunny for a promo? Get professional reviews on Time Trials? Sweep the floor? Change the air filter? Re-arrange the books on my bookshelf?

Oh the pressure, the pressure, the pressure.

I felt my knees about to buckle when finally, the voice of reason in my head (where the heck have you been???) yells “stop you big baby! TURN OFF YOUR PUSH NOTIFICATIONS!”

So…I did. There, much better. Once again, how many times have I had to repeat the words to myself, or rather listen to them from my inner (and much wiser) self? No one is pushing or chasing me for that matter. It’s not a race.

Who needs enemies, right?

Therefore, if you find you are your own notification pusher, put the hammer down. Deep breathe. It’ll get done. Or not. But the sun will still rise in the east and set in the west. Might as well enjoy the journey.

(Sigh) Okay, no push notifications for me. Now where’s that little “to do” list?

Cheers in 2016 to all...     

December

December. How is that possible? Time for a post to the Insecure Writers Support Group, created by Alex Cavanaugh (thanks Alex!). 

Our topics are fears, struggles, insecurities, challenges, or encouragements as writers. This past month I’ve touched on all of the above.

My first two books were published with the help of a publisher, relieving me of any of the formatting issues. For my latest novel, Time Trials, I flew solo as a self-publisher. Hence the fears, struggles, insecurities and challenges.

I have always used a professional editor (which I highly recommend), and once I handed over the finished project I thought I had time to kick up my feet, and take a much needed deep breath.

Wrong.

Little did I know the worm hole I was days away from being hurled down. 

Each editing rewrite took only a day or so…there were three. Editing done.

Scramble. Scramble. Scramble. Blurb, title page, dedication & acknowledgements, copyright page…and then the formatting. Should be simple.

Wrong.

Not that formatting was difficult, I had just never done it before. And to top it off, I’d set a deadline to format, submit, review, publish, order, & have an initial shipment delivered in time for a possible book signing on December 5. EVERYTHING I attempted got screwed up and had to be redone…twice. Submitting a 8.5 x 11inch formatted manuscript for a 6 x 9 inch book didn’t work. Who knew? Cover design, margins, indentations, headers (different for even and odd pages), page numbers, page breaks for new chapters…any of this sound familiar to you who knew where the stones were when you walked on water?

Throwing myself on the floor, kicking, yanking my hair, screaming…every childish prank I could think of I pulled…royally. Then poof…it was completed.

Oh….

Sunday night I hit the “submit” button on CreateSpace. Done.

Okay, time for a little breather.

Wrong again.

Monday morning I wake up to an email: “Congratulations! Your book has met our criteria. Your book will be published on Amazon in 3-5 days.”

Wow, that was fast.

But wait…it gets better.

Later that afternoon I find my book is already up on Amazon.
What? Amazon has nothing better to do on Cyber Monday? They said 3-5 days! 

This is happening too fast. It's going to be out there! On the big "Zon!" Will anyone like it? 

Sound familiar?

 

Now the encouragement: you too can make it through this crazy maze of self-publishing. It's a wacky ordeal of jumping through hoops...but worth it. As for the formatting lesson, I will certainly make notes for the next go-round. But it’s done. Today, I’m kicking up my feet…and waiting for the next something or another. But with a smile.  

Birth of a Book…24 month gestation (ouch)

November is here and time for another post to the Insecure Writers Support Group, created by Alex Cavanaugh. To stay on track, our topics need to be about struggles, insecurities, challenges, or encouragement. Today I choose challenges...

 On September 30, at 12:38 PM, I completed book #3, announcing the arrival of my new born, Time Trials. Still steps to take before the final product is up for publication, but the characters finally allowed me to say DONE (my delivery date).

I speak only for myself as my writing career didn’t begin until my late 50’s, but writing a book is like having a baby…somewhat. There’s the initial stage where not much is showing. A lot of excitement, identified my characters, created the story board and off I go.

A bit into the story I began to feel rumblings of unease. Something didn’t feel right, although the belly of the book was beginning to show. Then, the ding, ding, ding goes off. What I’ve spent 8-12 months writing, turns out to be more the middle of the book. Rats.

 This sometimes happens when I give free-range to my characters.

Thank goodness the human female gestation periods don’t work this way. Can you imagine a woman having to “re-do” the first trimester? (I hear screams)

After some hormonal temper tantrums, I began the journey of creating the first part of the book. I rationalize, hey…by the time I catch up to my original beginning, I’ll be two-thirds done.

Wrong.

 Time Trials covers three different time periods (1972, 1992, 2012). And each required its own research, which required more time. And then more time.

Wading through the maze of publishing and marketing my first two books, Saving Gracie & Partly Sunny, I found less and less writing time geared toward Time Trials. Where did the hours, weeks, months go? Literally, days raced by in a blur. 

I have two pets who can tell time. They sat at my feet day after day. At five o’clock each afternoon they'd move in closer, if that is possible, and stare at me like “uh…duh, have you not looked at the clock lately?”

Seriously? Didn’t I just feed you guys? You mean another day has already slipped away? They nodded and proceeded with their meal.

Having a baby is a labor of love. Writing a book is a labor of love. My initial thoughts about the story line for Time Trials turned into much, much more “labor” than I anticipated. Tons of research later, which I found I actually enjoyed, year #1 rolled into year #2. Some days I’d sit at the computer and pat myself on the back after rolling out 1,000-2,000 words. Then I’d see a post on Facebook like:

“Had a creative idea when I woke up this morning. Have already cranked out 3,000 words and still going.”

Really? Where’s my light saber? I feel like zapping something...

Other days the typing went so slow one would think both hands had been tied behind me with a pencil wedged in my mouth pecking out each word.

Frustrating? Yes

Rewarding? Yes

Completing a novel? Ecstatic

According to my calculations, my trimesters on Time Trials lasted 8 months, which means my book/baby gestation period surpassed an African elephant’s pregnancy by 2.5 months…ouch

I

Challenging...